Husband Jokes – Wife and Husband Jokes, SMS, Quotes, Pics and more

1 Burger Or Kiss

Burger Or Kiss

Burger Or Kiss

Wife: Can u help me in the gardening ?

Husband: What do u think I am…a gardener ?

Wife: Can u fix the door handle ?

Husband: What do you think I am… a Carpenter ?

In the evening, when husband came from work, he saw everything has been fixed.

Husband: Who did all this ?

Wife: Our neighbour.

But he gave me 2 options…..

Either I should give him a burger or a kiss.

Husband: I am sure u must have given him a burger.

Wife: What do u think I am…….McDonalds ?!!

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2 Wife and Husband

Wife and Husband

Wife and Husband

Wife:
whenever we keep the money in the bags our son steals it,
I don’t know what to do…
Husband: keep it in his books. I know he will never touch them

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3 Wife and Husband

Wife and Husband

Wife and Husband

Wife: Btao Tmhe Main Kitni Achchi Lagti Hoon
Husband : Bahut Zyada

Wife : Phir Bhi Kitni
Husbnd : Itni Ki Dil Chahta Hai Tumhari Jaisi 1 Aur Le Aaun.

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4 Husband aur wife in hotel

Husband aur wife in hotel

Husband aur wife in hotel

Husband aur Wife Hotel
me gaye tabhi 1 Lady ne Hello kiya,
Wife nay pocha,”Koun Thi Wo?”
Husband:-Tum dimagh kharab mat karo,
main pehle hi pareshan hun k woh bhi Yehi pochay gi.

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5 Aapne to bola tha ki without reason no drinking

Wife and Husband

Wife and Husband

Wife: Kyun ji, Aapne to bola tha ki without reason no drinking,
Abhi why drinking..?

Husband: Darling Deepavali is coming na
rocket fodne ke liye bottle chahiye na

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6 Kitna Pyar Karte Ho

Wife and Husband

Wife and Husband

Wife : Jaanu batao tum mujh se kitna pyar karte ho?

Husband : Bahut zyaada.

Wife : Phir bhi kitna

Husband : Itna ki dil kar raha hai ki tumhari jesi ek aur le aaoon.

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7 Intelligent Husband

Wife and Husband

Wife and Husband

Wife is busy packing her clothes.
Man: And where are u going?

Wife: I’m moving to my mother.

Husband also starts packing.
Wife: And where do u think your going?

Husband: I’m also moving to my mother.
Wife: And what about the kids?

Husband: Well if u moving to ur mother and I’m moving to my mother then I guess they must also move to their mother….

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8 Wife and Husband

Wife and Husband

Wife and Husband

Husband wife both die in a car crash. Husband becomes bhoot. Wife becomes Dayan.
They both meet after some time.
Wife: Kitne changed lag rahe ho bhoot bankar.
Husband: pagli, Par tum bilkul nahi badli. Still the same

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9 Wife and Husband

Wife and Husband

Wife and Husband

Why husbands avoid questions!
WIFE : What would you do if i died ? Would you get married again ?
Husband : No….
Wife : Why not ? Don’t you like being married ?
Husband : Of course i do.
Wife : Then why wouldn’t you remarry ?
Husband : Ok, ok, i’d get married again….
Wife : Would you live in our house with your new Wife….?
Husband : Yes, it’s a great house.
Wife : Would you let her drive my car ?
Husband : Yes, its almost new, dear.
Wife : Would you give her my jewelry ?
Husband : No.. I am sure she would want her own..
Wife : Would she wear my shoes..?
Husband : No, her size is ‘6’
Wife : –silence–
Husband : ‘shiiit’…!!

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10 Wife and Husband

Wife and Husband

Wife and Husband

Wife: I have a good news and a bad news.
Husband: I m very busy. Just give me the good news.
Wife: the airbags in our new AUDI worked perfectly fine.

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